So when I write these reviews I try to be as honest as
possible. I won't tell you that a movie is good or even so so if it truly
stinks. This movie rivals the odors of the strongest skunk.
A description of the movie is something I can't really give
a good telling of. The box says it's about Constantine joining the Roman army
in the hopes of finding his long lost childhood friend. It talks about his
climbing the ladder of success to the point of being crowned emperor only to
find his rival has held his friend captive. I gathered none of that in what
little I saw of this movie.
I say that because I was so bored while watching it that I
began to doze off early on. I would wake, watch a bit more and doze off again.
I did see enough for it to irk me that we once again have a costumer who knows
how to make clothes for people but apparently thinks that if you are a solider
traipsing through the forest and involved in numerous battles your clothes and
armor retain that fresh from the rack look to them. Throw a little dirt on
those clothes for goodness sake. Make them look lived in! As they appear in
this film you have to wonder if they weren't borrowed from another movie that
wanted them back the next day in pristine condition. Suspension of belief is
one thing but this is going too far. The fact is far too many low budget
historic recreations are suffering from this problem.
The worst thing about this movie though is the fact that it
is supposed to be the last movie ever made by actor Peter O'Toole. O'Toole was
one of the finest actors to grace the screen. He gave so many memorable
performances that to single one out would be to do him an injustice. And yet
this will be the one that takes the final spot on his resume. That's truly a
shame.
As I was saying about honesty, I did not watch this entire
film. I couldn't bring myself to do it. I watched the first 30 minutes in about
4 snippets and finally gave up it was so bad. I couldn't find anything that
made it worth finishing. More than that I don't feel the least bit of guilt in
not doing so. The best thing about this movie was the fact that it didn't
battle me when I pushed the stop button bringing it to a grinding halt. If you
happen to find this DVD in the $1 bin at the
local video store after it comes off the shelf you'd find that $1 better spent
buying candy or a large drink at McDonald's. It would be money better spent.
Click here to order.
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