Friday, February 25, 2011

VAMPIRES SUCK: AND THIS MOVIE ALMOST DOES AS WELL

The film parody has become an overused genre these days. When AIRPLANE and Mel Brook’s movies hit back in the seventies the genre was in its infancy and most of those movies were hilarious. But that changed after a while. The jokes became far too predictable and shows like SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE and SCTV gave us better parodies that didn’t drag for an hour and a half.

A parody that did well was SCARY MOVIE. The problem was that the success of that film inspired studio execs to make sequel after sequel with each one worse than the previous effort. And from the writers of those movies came Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer. Trust me, if you see these two names on a movie marquee, choose whatever else is playing. Ads have touted films as “made by two of the names behind SCARY MOVIE”. Well they may have been involved in that film, but apparently the talent found in them was to be found in the rest of the writers. This is the pair responsible for DISASTER MOVIE, EPIC MOVIE, DATE MOVIE and MEET THE SPARTANS. If you liked those more power to you. If not, then avoid there movies unless you rent them for $1 or less.

This brings us to VAMPIRES SUCK. The movie is a parody of the current fad of vampire movies portraying vampires as objects of lust and desire rather than fear, focusing mainly on the TWILIGHT films. Nods to other films run through this movie but they mainly aim their barbs that direction.

Becca Crane (Jenn Proske) is a lonely teen stuck in the small town her father is a sheriff in. Of course the most romantic is Edward Sullen (Matt Lanter). Get it? Sullen? That’s the level of humor found here. In any event, the film follows a combination of various scenes from the TWILIGHT films and attempts to make them funny. The thing is for some of us the actual TWILIGHT films were funnier than what is offered here.

Don’t get me wrong, this film is perhaps one of the best that this pair has made. There are a few good jokes tossed in here and I’m not going to share those with you because should you choose to watch the film a few paragraphs will spoil it for you. It would take just those few words to describe the good moments seen here.

When I first watched the film I didn’t think it was really that bad. But the more I thought about it, the more I compared it to the films that Mel Brooks and the Zucker brothers have made, the worse it felt.

The best part of the film is Jenn Proske. She totally captures the lame acting that Kristin Stewart has displayed in the TWILIGHT movies. I’m not saying she’s bad here, I’m saying that she portrays Becca the exact same way that Stewart does Bella Swan. So much so that you’ll wonder if you watching Stewart from time to time.

The one thing this movie does is make you miss other movies. I miss those great vampire movies of the past. I miss Christopher Lee as Dracula in HORROR OF DRACULA. I miss Frank Langella in DRACULA. I miss great parodies like BLAZING SADDLES, YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN and even a great vampire spoof like LOVE AT FIRST BITE. This movie doesn’t do those justice. It may not be the worst film out there, it may even be worth a $1 rental, but it is not something you’re likely to add to your collection or find yourself cued up for on Netflix.

No comments:

Post a Comment