The fantasy genre has made some great movies. Tops among them were the films of Ray Harryhausen, the legendary stop motion animation director who found a way to make us believe everything from giant octopuses to flying harpies to skeletons carrying shields and swords. He introduced us to Jason and the Argonauts and took us on many voyages with Sinbad. Unfortunately there have been some who have taken his joy of the fantasy genre and turned it into crass film making that offers nothing to rejoice in.
I’m beginning to think that the SyFy channel is more detrimental to the genre than it is helpful. Sure, they make a good show like the STARGATE series or BATTLESTAR GALACTICA. But when it comes to made for TV movies, SyFy turns out some of the worst drek possible. I swear, if I have to glimpse a preview for another snake movie I might go mad!
Using CGI effects for almost all of these films, they seem to misunderstand how to use it. Rather than take the painstaking time to make the items in CGI seem real, they rush it into production and toss out an inferior product that, with any luck, only the least jaded 10 year old will find a reason to enjoy. For those of us who grew up with Harryhausen or who loved the Rings trilogy, the movies SyFy is churning out leave much to be desired.
That being said lets take a look at CYCLOPS. I have fond memories of the Cyclops due to THE 7TH VOYAGE OF SINBAD made by Harryhausen (thus the connection to this film and reason I mentioned him earlier). Perhaps the best thing that can be said about this movie is that after watching it, you’ll want to go back and watch those old films.
The movie takes place in ancient Rome where Emperor Tiberius (Eric Roberts) rules. The games in the coliseum are not what they once were and new entertainment is sought. The emperor is in luck when a Cyclops is discovered roaming the countryside, recently killing several travelers who attempted to rob him.
Tiberius sends out his most successful solider, General Romulus (Kevin Stapleton) to capture the beast at the request of his right hand man, a man who has more motive to hope for Romulus’ failure than his success. Of course Romulus does capture the beast and take him back. Now the Cyclops can compete in the arena for all to see.
Rather than hail the conquering hero, Romulus demands satisfactory payment for his capture of the Cyclops, but word from the politician to the ears of Tiberius not only prevents this but also stops his being hailed as a hero as well. Further conniving results in Romulus being stripped of his rank and tossed into the gladiator pit to fight the monster.
While imprisoned, Romulus gets a glimpse as to the real personality of the beast. He is no more monster than man, simply tortured by all he meets and hungry. The pair become at least friendly and you realize early on that should they face off against one another they’ll choose friendship over a fight to the death.
The big day arrives and after several battles the beast is released. So what happens? I won’t spoil it for those who love cheesy fantasy films or low budget CGI happenings. But it is fairly predictable.
To try and calculate where this movie goes wrong is impossible. The sets are terrible, most notoriously the arena where the battles take place. Whereas most movies of this genre show huge arenas (even the low budget sword and sandal films of the 60s had huge arenas) I’ve seen small town football stadiums that are bigger than this one.
The acting? Is that what you would call this? Roberts has the ability to act, but here he seems content to increase his bank account and opting to take the money and run rather than perform. If you thought Kevin Costner’s accent in ROBIN HOOD PRINCE OF THIEVES was bad, try out Roberts New York accent via ancient Rome. And Stapleton (who I guess stars on TV’s ONE LIFE TO LIVE) should stick to soaps. He not only can’t act, he has no star presence here at all. He looks completely out of place.
The Cyclops itself isn’t too bad looking, just poorly rendered in CGI. The shadows rarely match properly, the quality of the set image when placed against the CGI is way off and in general the whole of the effects fails miserably.
If you rent this movie from say a Redbox for a dollar, find a way to get your money back. It is truly a bad movie and not even in the so bad its good category. And if SyFy continues to make movies like this, my guess is the ratings will decrease rapidly.
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