MARTIAL ARTS DOUBLE FEATURE-KUNG FU GIRL/WHIPLASH: FOR FANS ONLY

While many have heralded that discovery of the grindhouse film over the past decade the fact is that many of us were exposed to those same movies not via small unsavory locations filled with hookers and junkies but in areas as diverse as drive-ins and even television. For martial arts movie fans across the country there were countless chop socky programs offered on local and national channels that brought out the lowest priced films from both the Shaw Brothers and Golden Harvest studios. All seemed to be shot on the same sets (many were) and made with more effort spent on wire work than on story.

But those weren’t the only films being made in China at the time. Others dealt more with story that was deep and involved history as well as legends of old. The problem was that those films definitely lost much in translation, sometimes literally and at other times due to the difference in societies. How could European based countries relate to the struggles of peasants over emperors and corrupt governments officials? And yet we tried to absorb these stories and enjoy them. For most it was less about the story and more about the whole phenomena of kung fu battles.

Which brings me around to the release of this double feature from Shout Factory. Martial arts aficionados will no doubt recognize the star of both KUNG FU GIRL and WHIPLASH, Pei-Pei Cheng. She was one of the shining lights of the genre in China. So much so that when director Ang Lee made CROUCHING TIGER HIDDEN DRAGON he chose her to play one of the lead roles. But while her name may be synonymous with the genre in China my guess is that few here know her. That can change thanks to DVDs being released, starting with this disc.

The stories here differ from one another. GIRL takes place in the Chinese Republic where a ruthless general decides to take over the country and proclaim himself emperor. Student activists (though while watching I just thought they were peasant bandits, an example of the lost in translation I spoke of) strike out against him. Cheng stars as a young woman who impersonates the long lost sister whose brother has been arrested in the hopes of getting close to the new emperor’s chief of security. This one features a much deeper plot than one usually expects from the typical martial arts flick and will requires more attention than one would expect from the genre we grew up with.

The second film, WHIPLASH, plays more for combination of comedy and action. The movie opens with a group that heads to the mountains in the hope of finding a long lost treasure, but they run into problems. Cut to the home of Cheng which is set upon by a group of bandits. She takes on each one with a combination of martial arts and her bullwhip. One of the bandits was in possession of several of her father’s belongings and when questioned told her he was wounded in a ravine. Eventually she serves them wine till they are drunk, then ties them up and recruits them to assist her in finding her father, the man who led the group seen at the film’s opening. Along the way there is plenty of action, a little intrigue and lots of laughs from the various members of the bandits, most notably their always referring back to getting drunk.

One thing you notice when looking back at films like these is the speed, or lack thereof, on display during the action sequences. In a time now where we see lightning speed used in movies that feature both hand to hand combat as well as martial arts, these movies seem as if they are running in slow motion. But the reality of it is that this was the norm in those days. Accurate strikes, blows and responses were done protecting those involved in making the films while at the same time looking like fast paced action for the time. I think the only martial arts movies that seemed slower were any involving David Carradine. But they were so well choreographed that no one paid attention. All of that changed with the appearance of Bruce Lee.

But if you remember those films fondly, if you want to begin a collection of martial arts films that covers the genre from start to finish, then this wouldn’t be a bad place to start. It offers up one of the main stars of those films in two movies for the price of one. Note that neither is dubbed but die hards won’t care. For them it’s the love of the original films and not the westernization of them.

Click here to order.

KIDNAPPING MR. HEINEKEN: LIFELESS CAPER FILM

Having been alive back in 1982 when the actual kidnapping of Freddy Heineken took place I was surprised that I didn’t remember much about it taking place. Having recently watched and written about the history of the brewery it discussed the kidnapping towards the end of that documentary. When I saw that a feature film had been made about it I had high hopes. Those were quickly dismissed as the end credits rolled on this film.

If you’re not familiar with Heineken beer then you’ve never seen the world renowned small green bottles that it comes in. An old brewery based in Europe at first but transplanted here to the states as well, it is one of the most successful breweries in the world. Not only that but it remains, basically, a family owned company. Who better to target as a kidnapping victim then the head of the family?

Back in 1982 a group of friends are having hard times. Having begun a small construction company times are tough. To add to their problems an apartment building they purchased is causing them grief. A group of squatters has taken over the building and changed the locks and due to the way the law is written, they can’t be forced out because of this. The group of friends tries to toss them out and ends up in jail for their troubles.

Unable to come up with a way to retain their business and to take care of their families they come up with the idea to kidnap someone for a huge ransom. The talk eventually comes around to a local business owner worth millions, Freddy Heineken (Anthony Hopkins). To finance the operation the group first robs a bank for funds. Barely escaping from that escapade, the kidnapping is put into play. Heineken and his chauffer are taken in front of his house and transported to a secret location while the demands are made.

If all of this sounds rather mundane the truth is it unfolds that way as well. What little excitement there is to be found in this film comes during the bank robbery and subsequent chase and both are short lived. On top of that the movie makes it difficult to feel any sympathy for those behind the kidnapping once the opening sequences are done with their arrest at the apartment house. While based on reality it feels like a long stretch to move from construction worker to bank robber/kidnapper because a loan doesn’t go through. And yet that’s how it appears here.

Among the kidnappers are actors Jim Sturges and Sam Worthington, both who have made much better films in the past. Why they decided to get involved with this one is beyond me. Both are accomplished actors and do their roles well here but those roles don’t feel as if they offer much in the long run. Completely wasted is Hopkins as the kidnap victim. His scenes are short and sweet and offer little for him to do.

I always have a hard time steering people clear of movies that come out. I realize that there was a lot of time and effort put into any movie, even a bad one, by the cast and crew that were involved in making that film. At the same time, despite all of their efforts, when a bad movie is made I feel much better about warning people to avoid it than if I were to simply sit back and say oh yeah, good one. This movie never made me feel involved, never made me feel for the characters and moved along at a snail’s pace involving more bickering between the kidnappers than anything else in the story. In the end I would say pass this one by unless you feel the need to see everything ever made by the actors involved or have a love of Heineken beer. Even then you might be better off to spend it on a six pack than the cost of renting this movie.

Click here to order.

CINEMA WASTELAND: A BREED APART

While there are numerous horror fan conventions taking place around the country these days it’s hard to think of what they were like when it all began. The newest shows are mega-productions featuring the most recognizable stars from the hottest shows and movie around. That means that for horror fans they either feature casts from THE WALKING DEAD or AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY. The sad thing is most of those stars are busy filming and many cancel at the last minute not to mention the fact that they’re riding the wave of popularity at present rather than having established a long list of credentials when it comes to being dedicated to the genre. Not all but many. So what does the die-hard horror fan do when they want to join in with like-minded people with a love of horror?

I’ve had the chance to visit two different horror fan conventions. One that falls into the above category was my least favorite but okay. The best thing about it was the fact that I was finally able to take a vacation with my wife where it was just the two of us. That made it special. As for the show itself it was Scarefest and while they claim to be the best convention in the country I would say they flatter themselves. It was a huge event and by huge I’m talking about the size of the area it was held. It made getting from one place to another a LONG walk and at my age and with back problems it made the show more miserable for me than anything else. It also wasn’t dedicated to just horror fans but the paranormal crowd as well. This ended up being our reason for going since my wife is a dedicated GHOST HUNTERS fan. We had the chance to meet Steve, Dave, Adam and Grant and all were absolutely wonderful to talk with. I also got to meet up again with Ken Foree of DAWN OF THE DEAD. But the rest of the event wasn’t that enjoyable. A party was held in the hotel bar which means that hundreds of people were crammed into a space meant for a tenth of who showed. More attention was paid to cosplay folks than celebrities. And the vendor tables were less oriented towards horror fans and more geared towards things like mystic crystals, incense, psychic readings, vacation trips to haunted locations and the ilk. I think there was 1 table of DVDs for sale and maybe 2 tables with shirts (go Joel Robinson!). Comparing this convention to the other I’d attended I felt it was soulless and geared more towards the mainstream. It felt hollow and I found no connection with the event, those putting it on and others in attendance.

The same can’t be said for Cinema Wasteland.

I just returned from my latest venture into Wasteland and can say that after a ten year gap from my last visit, things have remained fan oriented and fun. I certainly have grown older and perhaps not as involved as in the past, but seeing horror fans connect this way made it enjoyable for me. Not only that, but while I wasn’t as involved with each and every one, you felt like family there.

A lot of this has to do with Ken Kish. I first met Ken while attending Wizard World in Chicago YEARS ago. He was selling T-shirts and videos my son was looking for and mentioned he held his own small convention in Cleveland. With that knowledge my son and I went to the next one there and since then I’ve been several times and my son had missed very few of the twice a year events. And it all boiled down to that first meeting with Ken and his wife Pam. They were both congenial, friendly and you could tell loved what they were doing. And that shows in the Cinema Wasteland events put on in April and October.

Let me give you a small rundown of how it works. The event takes place in a Holiday Inn in Strongsville, OH. While you might think the smaller venue would hurt the event it doesn’t at all (Scarefest in comparison took place in a huge convention hall that felt empty and devoid of life). It brings it in close for fans and celebs alike. You don’t feel crowded (unless you go to a panel that everyone wants to see) and you can walk the aisles of vendors and celeb signings with ease. Once you get your tickets, you walk through the doors into the main hall which is jammed packed with horror fan items. Everything from Living Dead Dolls to T-shirts with horror icons to DVDs (rare and popular) to movie posters and more. At the back end of the hall you’ll find numerous tables set up for the celebs with posters behind them touting their accomplishments. I have yet to meet a celeb at a Wasteland show that wasn’t friendly as could be and took the time to become involved with those there who loved their efforts. This is a convention where they are approachable as opposed to having numerous guards around them. They become part of the group.

During the day much goes on as well as the main room. There are 2 screening rooms, one for video the other for 16mm films, that will show everything from shorts to Three Stooges to classic horror and exploitation films to intermission loops to the movie being featured for that particular show. This time around it was DAY OF THE DEAD. While they didn’t do a panel during the movie this time (they normally present cast members doing a voice over to the celebrated film) they did have a panel discussion for the movie featuring almost the entire cast. The room was packed to the gills and while the sound system was a bit low it offered them a chance to talk about making the movie and to answer questions from the host of the panel and some from the crowd. One thing that happened (and that always happens here) was that the panel recognized the fans in the crowd for their support in coming out and for making them feel like people were actually interested in them and loving their efforts after all these years. It has been 30 years since the film came out. But these celebs said that this was one show where they felt like they were a part of the crowd, like they were being treated like family and loved it. And it’s true. You’re as likely to see one of the celebs out front smoking a cigarette with the crowd as you are to see them at the restaurant inside. There is no pretentious atmosphere here.

Other events are held during the weekend as well. Various horror hosts have special shows they put on. For instance Son of Ghoul of Cleveland hosted his annual Three Stooges fest that ended with a rare 16mm print of a 3-D short they made. He even handed out the once famous red/green lens glasses for all to enjoy the film. On Saturday night there was the annual A. Ghastlee Ghoul show featuring the horror host from Dayton, OH. You never know what to expect here. One time there was a talent show that ended up having a guy playing punk rockers The Ramones songs on a banjo. This time around Ghastlee and his wife Suspira offered a few songs to rock out, a game show that gave contestants the choice of a prize of taking instead what was in Ghastlee’s underwear (he put a second pair on over his clothes and they had to reach in for a different often goofy prize), Sally the Zombie Cheerleader had a game where contestants were blindfolded and had to eat various items the crowd groaned over, a choice of games thought up by Ghastlee and Joe the regular Wasteland door staff and more. It was a bit raunchy, a lot of fun and well attended. Perhaps the only fault with this event was that taking place at night some of the crowd were a bit too inebriated to attend. Their constant heckling and yelling out things that were funny only to them became a distraction that drove some folks out. In the end it was all fun and much free stuff was handed to the crowd. It was all good.

Are you getting the picture yet? Are you seeing that this is not your usual convention? There is so much more involvement here, so much more fun, so much more closeness.  And while this may feature the largest collection of tattoos, body piercings and black T-shirts this side of a biker bar the group that makes up the crowd feels like the complete opposite. These are the most congenial, the most friendly, the most accepting group of people you are likely to meet. When you leave at the end of the show chances are you will have made several new friends. If you run into them anywhere, including online, you are suddenly a part of the group. You are family. And that’s the main thing that makes this show better and different than any other.

It’s not about the autographs (which by the way Ken insists on keeping the prices reasonable as opposed to what those other shows are charging. Expect them to be much higher). It’s not about the screenings. It’s not about the shows. It’s not about the parties or the hanging out with friends in front of the hotel. It’s about becoming a part of the bigger picture. It’s a combination of people that ranges from DVD company owners, fans, celebs, vendors, artists and more who will join together for a love of horror and exploitation films, who will stand around together discussing which movies they love or hate, who will share a drink or a smoke and a phone number because they are a part of the “family” now.

So if you decide you want to visit a convention you have two options. Go to the boring only-for-profit’s-sake shows where you will likely stand in line for an hour to pay $40-50 for an autograph and never see the celeb anywhere but their table all weekend while never making a friend of anyone else there…or…you can go to Cinema Wasteland where if you are willing everyone is your friend, the celebs mingle with the crowd, an autograph doesn’t go over $20 (at least not that I saw) and the odds of getting enough sleep are rare due to your involvement with the whole group. While once the weekend was over I turned to my friend who went along and quoted Danny Glover by telling him I was getting to old for this shit, I did have a good friend. I made some new friends. I saw some old ones. I adopted each of my son’s friends as my own. And I knew that if I had to choose one convention to go to, this would be it.

If you’re interested in Cinema Wasteland here is a link to their web site. While they haven’t posted the details on the next show (come on, give Ken and Pam a chance to recover from this one!), I can tell you that the October show will be celebrating the third movie in the franchise, LEATHERFACE: CHAINSAW MASSACRE 3. Members of the cast and crew are scheduled to be there. So check the web site frequently and start making plans. October will be here sooner than you think.

Click here to visit the Cinema Wasteland site.